This blog will be an outlet for my opinions on what matters most to me: art, literature, politics, culture, fashion, film, music, etc. Things surrounding and shaping my life in general.
I'm trying to approach my senior year of HS with optimism, I have so much to be happy about this upcoming year. At the same time, I can not help but be nervous and anxious. It finally occurred to me that I did not spend much time outside this summer, which sort of puts me in a lamentable mood. In February when it is disgusting and miserable outside, I pray for the weather to be the way it is now. Why do I never take advantage of opportunities when they are right in front of me? I take too much for granted.
While I desperately try to grasp the fleeting summer days, so much is on my mind, perhaps because I have so much time to think about things. I want to revamp my look so that it mirrors the confidence and happiness I'm currently feeling on the inside, but so far have no idea to go about doing it. Those who know me know that I love fashion and loathe shopping, so undergoing the "metamorphosis" I'm currently envisioning for myself should be an interesting process. While I say I "love" fashion, that too, is a contradiction. What frustrates me most would be the whole fashion industry itself, the politics of trends. Right now I am firm in the belief that as long as you have a strong point of view regarding how you dress and feel as though your style reflects you, I am not going to question what you wear. At all. The whole hierarchy of what is "in" and "out" in fashion makes no sense whatsoever, considering fashion, like everything in the arts, is so subjective. If you feel fabulous, who am I too judge? Especially considering the fact that everyone else is judging, too.
And even if you look fabulous on the outside, the most significant change you can make in appearance is due to whatever changes you have made emotionally. We all look best when we get enough sleep and are relaxed, in healthy relationships with friends, family, and loved ones. I am so happy to be in that position in my life right now. This is functioning as a motivator for making sure I look my best and feel great everyday, creating this crazy cyclical effect. I am currently in search of new jeans, a pea coat or a trench I can rely on for many years to come, and a wonderful ensemble I can wear to an upcoming concert.
"You were so pretty, you were like flowers in Spring," croons Justin Nozuka on
the song, "Seasons Change."
He sings those lyrics with a sad melancholy, a longing for a love faded long ago like the seasons. I've gotten to an age in which I've realized that life is going by at a much faster rate than I originally anticipated, and I hope I can recall certain times of my life and the emotion that flanks them in my memory with the same passion that he sings those lines. I hope to no longer regret summers that I haven't spent outside simply because I didn't spend much time outside. On one hand, I can call this summer particularly uneventful, for that fact alone, but this summer is like the big exhale in reaction to the stress and resulting growth I experienced last summer. And like the flowers of Spring, I hope to reflect the beauty in my spirit with that on the outside through my style...if only for a little bit.
Currently listening: "I Don't Know," Justin Nozuka
Currently reading: Chekhov short stories
Currently watching: Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho, Julie Delpy's 2 Days in Paris
